Author: Matt Spooner


Ascension Strikes Back.

Kira settled herself on the rise and slowly scanned the town in the distance with the binoculars.

It looked like every other town they had visited, abandoned cars in the streets, occasionally the blackened husk of a burnt building but most importantly, no signs of movement.

Dave squatted next to her.

‘Ascension Township. You will never find a more wretched hive of…..’

‘Don’t!’ She hissed through gritted teeth.

She snapped an angry look at Dave, his smirk quickly disappearing.

‘The world has ended. Everyone I’ve known or loved is dead, dying or a walking corpse. Civilisation doesn’t exist. We live in a world waiting to die. We’ve walked for 5 days to get here. We haven’t eaten for 3 days and the water ran out yesterday. I’ve got less than a dozen rounds left. I’m tired, I’m hungry, I’m thirsty, I’m scared and if you keep doing Star Wars quotes, I bloody kill you and then I’ll be alone.’

She looked back at the town, and grabbed her pack from the rocky ground.

‘Let’s get down there before night falls, you fricking moron,

She strode off, down the escarpment, kicking gravel and she stomped off.

Dave stood and sighed.

‘ I’ve got a bad feeling about this ‘ he muttered as he jogged to catch up with her.


A Warlord’s price

The village was still smouldering as the column of samurai approached through in the afternoon sun. Bodies were strewn through the pathways between the buildings and the wounded stood and bowed as the daimyo and his entourage made their way to the centre.

‘My lord, we were not expecting you so quickly’

The junior officer was shaking as he stood in the clearing, head bowed.

‘The gaijin approached under cover of darkness and fell upon us without warning. We mustered as quickly as we could but they came at us from all sides. Those that stood to first, were cut down. The rest of us barely were able to fend them off.’

Tetsuo looked around at the survivors. As his glance moved from man to man, they quickly looked down in order to not meet his his steely stare.

‘It seems that the officer in charge of this garrison was ill prepared and it was only that those animals had grabbed what they wanted that made them leave. Where is the leader of these men?’

The junior officer gestured to a corpse by the signal beacon.

‘Akita-san was killed trying to summon reinforcements, my lord’

Tetsuo shifted in his saddle to look back to one of his retainers.

‘Given his death, make sure that my displeasure is visited upon his family’, Tetsuo ordered through gritted teeth.

A lightly dressed warrior jogged into the village clearing and knelt in front of Tetsuo.

‘Lord, they are heading west with wagons. They seem to be making their way back to the border’

Tetsuo turned as was about to call for the wizard, but the wizened old man was already standing alongside the daimyo, where only seconds before there had been empty space.

‘Xin Loi, I will chase the barbarians down myself’, Tetsuo lowered his voice ‘Go to your…..allies and see if they will join me.’

The wizard’s voice was like cracking twigs, ‘You know the price they will ask?’

Tetsuo snapped back ‘Yes! I am not a fool, but they will earn their reward’.

The warlord turned his eyes to the west. These invaders didn’t know what they had started, the cost for his kingdom would be high but what was to come would mean that the army of Tetsuo Fujitaki would be feared across the whole world.


Different Class

Much better album.

I have a masterplan, and its a doozy.


First 2018 goal is the cunningly named #spreadthespoons.

Malifaux is the only system that I have played at tournaments and I want to change that this year. My goal is to play at 6 different system tournaments. 6. That’s a bloody lot. AT the moment the systems are likely to be:

Age of Sigmar – Already booked in for the end of Jan. No army painted.

Epic40k – Already booked in for end of Feb. No army painted.

40k – Not booked in yet but do have an army painted.

Saga – Not booked in nor army painted.

Guildball – not booked in and no team painted.

Game #6 – not sure yet but could be Shadespire, Burrows and Badgers but mostly likely Batman. Crew not painted.

I also have MAGE and Bonescon to work on stuff for so will be a busy few months at the start of the year.


I’m also going to have a crack the #365/365 challenge (paint 365 miniatures during the year) as I have several full scale armies to paint. I want to revisit some historical gaming with NGN (currently planning 10mm ACW and WW2). He’ll want to have a go at Gangs of War too (so far the only new game that I am looking forward to trying in 2018 – and I already have the figures that I need!).

Gonna try to keep count of the purchases and sales of stuff on here too. Gotta show some restraint this year, mortgage to get and all that grown up stuff.

2018 Day 1

Miniatures purchased – 0

Miniatures painted – 0

Miniatures sold – 0

Lbs lost – 0

As Mike said, we must get back into the habit of regularly gaming, and that will lead to recording stuff and we can get into the cycle again. I’m hoping that either Monday or Friday can become a regular gaming day.


Last and by no means least in the #mindovermatter challenge. It has been really heartening to see the support that the Mfx community has put into supporting Mike and my favourite charity. We raised in excess of £1k at a single tournament and hopefully will be able to double that during the course of this year. The number of people in the hobby (myself included) have issues with mental health and as such, we all know someone that may occasionally need help.


Do or don’t look back in anger or not……I don’t bloody know!

My turn, I guess.

2017 has been a busy and interesting year outside of the hobby. Both me and SWMBO have changed jobs, her daughter finished school and we have committed to buying a house together in 2018. I certainly had less depressive episodes during the year, and that is a GOOD THING.


Hobby-wise? Same sh*t, different year!

I didn’t really set much in the way of hobby goals in 2017 other than the plan to play Arcanist in Malifaux for 2017 and hope to beat Pete Shepherd (which I did!!).

I didn’t set any goals around painting (which is just as well)! We all had some fun with #FDWHP for a bit but in the end found that it was just too constraining and the old adage of ‘paint what you want to paint’ brought it to an end.

I did, however, get quite a bit painted earlier in the year and put together a decent looking selection of Arcanist models with a return to my first master, Ramos, and his horde of mechanical spiders. Malifaux has been the cornerstone of my gaming for a very long time and the only game that I have ever played competitively (although some will challenge on how competitive I have ever been!!). I found that during the year, I slowly felt that I had lost the inclination to play Mfx and spent some time trying to figure out why.

Some critics had spoken about the game suffering from an element of model bloat, which I want agreed with but did find it increasingly difficult to figure out what people were using and the potential counter to it. This is undoubtably more about my lack of skills rather than the game, but I had barely scratched the surface of Wave 4 before Wave 5 was upon us and I just couldn’t be arsed. Felt like too many rules that changed the mechanics and too many killer combos for me to enjoy. So I stepped away from the game (and Mike did so too which also probably influenced each others decision).


8th edition 40K arrived which seems to have solved many of the issues that had made me stop playing that game. I have been a 40K fan since the olden days. I love the mythos and grimdark background of the game and had only been frustrated by the speed of the rule edition changes and the codex creep. That and the lack of gaming time with NGN (my long time 40k opponent) had seen me stop playing and sell up lots of the stuff. The new edition got me suitably buzzed enough to buy stuff to rekindle the Tau army that I had previously owned and sign up to play at a local tournament. I had 2 months to assemble and paint 2k points. Easy.

Procrastination left me with 72hrs to assemble and paint 2k points and then circumstances prevented me from attending the event but I did get the bloody stuff painted. I hope to finesse the paint jobs a bit and attend a tournament in 2018 with them.


The General’s Handbook 2017 came out for Age of Sigmar. It got rave reviews and the AoS community seems to get very excited about it. SO I started collecting some bits with a view of getting a Nurgle Daemon army that I could also use for 40K. Well, that has expanded somewhat and I will have a big pool of models for AoS and hope to attend a tourney or two for that too.

As is ever the case, Mike and I encouraged a number of purchases of new rules and toys, many of which we haven’t yet played. Mike shows them on his post and there are some that I am still keen to try out. Dracula’s America and Scrappers deserve a play.

I did manage to flog off some bits that I was never going to use, and that process will continue during 2018 (especially as I will be moving house and could do with less boxes to move!!).

Saw some great movies, and some that were less good.

Not a bad year, I guess but 2018 will be better!!


Love and stuff to wash out of your hair



When it’s good, it’s very good……

….but other times it’s f##cking awful.


For many of us, the hobby is what makes us smile and gives a purpose to those slivers of time that we are not working, sorting out the kids, doing chores, doing DIY, pretending to enjoy socialising with the other half’s friends and all the mundane things in life. 

Nothing is more satisfying than the buzz of starting a new crew/team/army/force for a rule set, whether it’s one that you know and love or something new. 

And there’s nothing worse than losing hobby mojo. 

There are many reasons, some of which we have discussed during our waffle. Whether falling out of love with a favoured rule set, loss of regular gaming buddy or being disenfranchised by what you read on FB forums. 

For those of us that suffer with depression, anxiety, PD or any number of other mental health issues it can also be a warning bell. Losing motivation to do the things you enjoy is a common sign of a depressive episode and for us loony hobbyists can be the start of a cycle that is hard to break. 

‘I don’t want to play cos I feel like crap and can’t deal with people and because I haven’t played or seen my mates I feel like crap’. 

Social media can be a double edged sword. Easy and non-personal contact with other hobby people is great. Seeing the bad side of gamer’s attitudes and net-listing can be bad. 

If you’re lucky, you’ll have a gaming buddy that can always pull you out of the murk whether with infectious enthusiasm for something new or (in the case of my best mate), a face that looks damn funny. 


Time to get back on it…..

Been a while since I came in your eyeholes, sorry about that.


First off….yes I did get the tau all done and then couldn’t go to the event due to a family issue. Joel, Lee and Mike all paid up promptly and I sat comfortably on my moral high ground (well, I may have left it until 72 hrs before the event to crack on but still finished the blighters)


While they were in the ‘planning stage’ (more like the denial phase) Knight Models released the 2nd Edition of the Batman Miniatures Game. There are new crews in resin and streamlined and updated rules. I have been looking for something to replace Malifaux as my low model count crew type game so I worked hard (wasn’t hard) to get Mike excited about wanting to play.


He has gone for the Joker and Harley Quinn and I’ve chosen Bane but I am fairly sure that we will have a few varying gangs……

The tournament scene for BMG seems quite southern-centric and small but active. Looks like the FD wagon will be hitching itself to this for next year.

The rules are available for free as a download from Knight Models (as are the model cards) and have been updated a couple of times due to errata and updates. They seem good so watch this space and hopefully we’ll do some recording soon.


Been a slack haddock….

…and haven’t posted in ages. 

Had a bit of time where I was becalmed from a hobby perspective. I did get some bits done for the Dragon Rampant army.

…but then had no motivation for a week. Have restarted with some other bits…

But now I have a bigger fish to fry.

I have just signed up to play in a 40k tournament on the 7th October. 

36 days away.

2000 points. Fully painted.

Current number of points painted…..0. No pressure then…….bugger.



R’alai took another deep breath before opening his eyes.

‘A warrior with your…..qualities’

The feint praise was amongst what Ethereal had said. The pause in the statement carried more meaning than the words themselves.

He focussed again on the holo-image floating in front of him. The planet was a rock. A desert, stripped of life. It was also a strategic lynchpin in the expansion around the wound that now split the galaxy in two.

‘A warrior with your…..qualities’

The humans knew of the value of the planet too. Sensors had shown that the rumours shared by the Water Caste members across the system were true. Imperial troops were also en route. The Ethereal  been clear. The Empire must control this world or the fifth phase expansion would be in jeopardy.

R’alai turned his head slightly and acknowledged the Shas’El waiting patiently by the door.

‘Prepare the Darkstrike. Ke’lshan goes to war.’

Alone again, R’alai closed his eyes and focussed on his breathing.

‘A warrior of your…..qualities’

He felt the heat and prickle rise as he thought of the war ahead. T’au would die, they would suffer and perish. Yet the anticipation of battle stirred something within R’alai. Animalistic and angry. Mont’au still burned within him. His men knew, the Ethereal had known, and now the humans would know.

‘A warrior of your……qualities’


Do..Do..Do…the funky gibbon…..ooh..ooh..ooh

Mike and myself went on our much delayed trip to watch the latest instalment of the Planet of the Apes reboot – War for the Planet of the Apes.


We had both enjoyed the 2 previous movies (Rise and Dawn) and, I think, both had high hopes that this one would be as good.

SPOILERS – if you haven’t seen it and don’t want to know what happens – bugger off!

The story picks up 15 years after the first movie with the Simian Flu apocalypse well established. The Apes are in the forest and the less pleasant humans from Dawn have called for help. A Special forces Colonel is hunting Caesar and his simian pals in the forest with a view of wiping them out.

Fights, death and gorillas ensue.

The movie has surprisingly little spoken dialogue and yet conveys a lot of feeling and touches on a lot of emotive themes. Throughout the duration of the film it has moments of Westerns, Racial/Slavery, War, Revenge and rites of passage.

Whether deliberately or not, it has heavy overtones of Apocalypse Now (with Woody Harrelson doing a passable Colonel Kurtz), Little Big Man/Man called Horse (with the Apes as the native Americans), Gladiator/Spartacus (Caesar seeking revenge) and even The Great Escape.

Despite there being some clearly derivative elements, and some scenery chewing by Woody Harrelson (why do bad guys insist in wearing sunglasses at night!!!?), I really enjoyed it. The performance of Andy Serkis/CGI as Caesar was astounding, often conveying emotion through nothing other than the breathing and eyes of the ape. I don’t know how, but surely it is time that Serkis’ work in motion capture acting is recognised by an awards body.

Well worth seeing, if you enjoyed the previous 2 Apes movies. Get your arse to the cinema and stop………..monkeying around.

Yeah, I know. Sorry.

Cuddles and violations of personal space,